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You need to stay at least until the cake-cutting and bouquet tossing, etc is all done. Let her know ahead of time (not the day of the wedding, but before that) that you will not be able to stay until the very end. This way she won't be disappointed or hurt if you leave before the night is done. Before you leave that night, make sure that she doesn't need anything, or that you've arranged to have anything she does need taken care of (collecting gifts to bring home, etc). Also, you might want to let the maid of honor and other bridesmaids know that you can't stay the whole time because they might get miffed that you're not there to help clean up (if that's needed). Just keep people in the loop and it should be alright.
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