What is the proper etiquette on...?

[Court G.]

I have been invited to 2 weddings for 2 fairly good friends in the coming months. Both invitation have come with the "and guest" note. I am currnetly single and unattached but talking to someone casually. I would like to respond to their requests as quickly as possible but I am not sure if I should respond with 2 guests attending (in the case that I have a date) or just respond as 1 attending?

Thanks in advance.

[brainy_blonde]

I would say 2-better to show up without someone than to bring an unexpected extra guest. You could always bring just a friend or even a family member.

[Puzzler]

Respond with 2 attending....if your date is going to be a 'no show', let the bride's family know within a week of the wedding.

[kill_yr_television]

Unless you are 99% certain not only that you will be bringing a guest, but 100% certain of this guest's name as well, then you should be attending on your own. The Wedding Industry has fostered the myth that hosts must allow single guests to bring a "date" -- to bring a perfect stranger (to hosts, bride, and groom) to wine and dine at the hosts' expense. Nothing could be further from the truth.

It is very gracious and generous BUT NOT REQUIRED to ask single guests "Is there someone special you'd like for me to invite for you?" and, if a name is immediately forthcoming, send a SEPERATE invitation to that special person.

You'd think that where a free champagne supper is involved it would be a no-brainer to invite every guest by name. Open-ended "& family" or "& guest" invitations are ASKING for trouble, but The Wedding Industry only cares about making weddings more and more expensive, not about what is best for those most affected.

The "& guest" invitation is especially troublesome in that many singles receiving such an invite feel that they MUST bring a date. The host ends up paying $60 for that date to attend, paying to provide a champagne supper for someone that they don't know or like, and that whoever brought the date doesn't much know or like either. The "old days" of singles coming singly was better -- there was the excitement of meeting other singles.

[Stacie]

Well respond by the deadline, if you are still unsure just RSVP for 2 but if for any reason you decide to go stag then let the bride and groom know a week or two prior to the wedding or they are gonna get stuck paying for an extra plate (which is a big expense)! Good luck and hope you have a date.

[Beach Girl]

At this point, it would behoove the bride for you to 'include' your guest. Reply that you will attend with one guest (no names at this time).

She can then have the right number of seats, meals, etc. ready and your guest will be able to sit with you without disrupting the tables. If you have to come solo at the last minute, it's okay...but regardless you are covered and so is the seating arrangement.