How do I cope with a death in the family?

[Jordan M]

My family member just passed away. He was my cousin and shot himself in the head. None of my family knows why and I don't know how to deal with this for being a 15 year old and still in high school. I don't want to talk to any of my friends about it because I don't think they will understand at all. Me and my cousin we're very close, despite the 5 year age difference.

I just miss him so much and I don't know what to believe or not to believe now. I have felt like I'm in a coma for the past two weeks because I don't think its real. I feel like I'm dreaming everything. Because I don't want it to me real at all.

And everyone is tending to everyones else's wounds because of this tragedy but what about me? I feel Neglected and not a concern. But I think I am.

Every time I go to school in the morning I just want to open the door and get hit by a car or semi-truck because I don't want to be here anymore.

I just don't know how to feel.
Help?

[Imena's mommy]

I lost my dad two years ago april, I know HOW EXTREMELY hard this process is. Talk to your friends hon. If they are truly your friends (though they may not understand) they will embrace you. Don't lock yourself up, you will fall into a deep depression. I did, and I am still depressed. I am so sorry. I know that words can never bring him back. Please take care of yourself. Immerse yourself in the world. It will hurt at first but once you get out there it will feel much better. You are your family are in my thoughts. :'(

[Sevilla]

I am so sorry for your loss. I do understand your pain. When I was 16 a classmate died the same way. But what helped me WAS to talk about it. I really think it will help if you can surround yourself with supportive people. Your friends may not understand how you are feeling but if they are good friends they will be there for you and will WANT to be there for you. If you don't talk to somebody about it, you will sink deeper into this depression. Please talk to somebody. A school counciler is another great option.

You are in my prayers