Not accepting as a friend?

[Allanah555]

you say she is cute and young. WHY?????

If you just want to be her friend, then this should not matter at all.
This thought should not enter you're mind.
I feel sorry for your wife. She deserves better!!!

If you need to talk to somebody, find counseling or something similar.

You should NOT be seeking a youger girl - outside of your marriage to talk to!!!

How would you feel, if your wife was doing that.

And furthermore......GOOD ON THE GIRL THAT REFUSES TO HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU

[Rajini A]

All,

I have a colleague at my office and finding few issues. She is cute and young. I am married and she is also aware of this. I just want her to be as my friend, just talk a lot and thats it. At times, she willingly talks to me and sometimes just for namesake..she talks to me. Dont know what is she expecting from me.. i am not looking for anything dirty from her..i want her to be my close friend..but she is not willing.. don't know why.. any ideas/tips..so that i can gain her confidence.. difficult to understand girls mentality..

[trinity7183]

It could be a lot of things. It could be that she respects your marriage so she doesn't want to get close because when she's married, she wouldn't want her husband getting close with another woman. It could be she's attracted to you and getting close would endanger her feelings. It could be you creep her out. There are any number of things. My advice is to just keep the friendship at a level she's comfortable with and not push for anything else.

[ZombiEarth]

Seems that shes not trying to get into your pants either. Youre looking way too much into this. Dont mistake a great personality for flirtation. It gets you in trouble.

[the sweetest JAM]

just talk to her naturally and let her, and other colleagues, meet your wife and kids. be open if you really just want to be friends with her.

[hope]

show through your actions and emotions that your wife is the one you chose for a reason.show how much you love your wife,by speaking highly of her and letting it be known that she will forever and always be the one for you on this earth as well in heaven,and that you married her for reason unexplainable.you dont want to sacrifice the bond you created with your wife over someone who cannot compare to your wife.because,if she could compare to you wife you would not be married right now.its clear you made your decision on who you love as much as you love yourself,if not when you realized you wanted to marry your wife.you will tested,but,thats just life checking up on you,trying to see if you made any changings in your plans for your life.only the strong minded and faithfull can past the test with flying colors.ask yourself these questions..how would you feel if you woke up next to a woman other then your wife every morning,would you miss her present?..also..if you were to interact with a woman other then your wife,how would you feel?..how would that affect your wife?..is your wife important to you?..do you want or feel you need more then your wife?..is your wife the one you married,then why does anyone have others have effect on you or have the ability to make you question anything?..why did you make a commitment to your wife?..why did you chose your wife to be with?..why would you build a life,a life-style,a bond,and trust with your wife on terms of love if you want more then her?..if you and your wife divorced,because,you wanted more then her,and you seen her on while you were out and about,how would feel when you seen her?..how would you act and be affected by your wife if you two divorced and you seen her with another man?..what do you see in your wife,that you decided to make her your other half?..
are you in love?love,true love,is giving someone the ablitiy to break your heart,and trusting them not to.
love is also the most confusing,yet,most needed and wanted thing in to exisit.you have love,do you want to be one who wants it,who needs it,when you have it.love is like magic,because,it cannot be explain.it just cant.
set boundries for yourself and your unappecting friend.if she cannot accept the boundries,then its obvious she doesnot respect you enough to give you your personal space,or your wife and marriage if ahe cannot be a friend and a friend only with no benefits.she obviously doesnot her much respect for herself if she cannot push aside and let you be.maybe your unaccepting friend has personal tributes that no one knows about and by you lending a listening ear she has found comfort in you and soon developed feelings for you with out trying.alot of women fall in love with someone that way,but,sometimes the woman has to realize that the person they found comfort in is not meant to be in their life in that way,only in a friend way and no other way.women love so easily thats why we get hurt so fast,because,we are weaken to love,and we mix up alot of signals in doing so.just listen as a friend,be a friend,talk as a friend,treat her like a friend,but,keep a distance,mentally and physically..to show you dont want any emotionally attachment.i might be only eight-ten years old,but,life doesnt care what age you are.when it wants to you have problems and struggle it will place that in your destiny.

[Rocky K]

I think I would try this approach, If you are in fact set on having her as a close-friend. Make it clear that is your only intention. ask her questions regarding your wife, for instance,

"I was thinking of buying my Wife this bracelet, Do you think she will like it"?

And tell her how much she means to you, that she is your everything, you know what I mean? If she cannot see that all you are looking for is friendship, after "clearly" letting her know that, And how much you Love and Appreciate your Wife, Then she is not what I would call "Friend" material anyways, and is looking for something more herself perhaps. That, or she is just a "snob", and does not care for friends in the work-place. Then you can just keep it nice and friendly with "Good Mornings", and only speak to her when it's necessary. I think that would be a good way personally, But I do not know this woman, And I am going strictly by what you have said here. It just sounds like there may be some "Communication" problem here is all. That's the way I see it anyways friend. I really hope this helps you out in some way. Good-Luck, and Take Care,

[karena karena]

Some women, like me, respect a man's marriage. I have a friend that i like a lot and he is married but I have known him before he was married. That makes a big difference to me because I always used to say that if I had to marry anyone at work, it would have been him. It burst my bubble just a little when he married because he was such a good friend and of course we still talk and laugh but it has a limit. I feel that it's okay to have married male friends but I don't want them to be too close to me because I don't want anything else to grow and I never would want their wives to feel I am trying to move in. Some wives are very, very jealous and you don't know she may have encountered that. I had a co-worker to tell me that a friend of mine who I looked at like a little brother but was very, very handsome how his wife who was just as pretty was jealous of her husband. To the young lady in which you are inquiring, she may be attracted to you and you not know it and is being respectful and cautious. Then on the other hand, she may not want you to be close to her like that and you will have to respect her wishes. A relationship is not composed of one person but two or more.

Take that energy that you are trying to put into her into where it counts the most ---- HOME.

[i like litter boxes]

i like mcdonalds

[little debbie]

she is probably keeping some distance so as not to create to many feelings.
can you blame her.
it is hard for guys and girls in general to be friends but its possible and happens all the time.
dont force it. friends become friends over time.