what to do with my ex-fiance?

[muniquita534]

just broke up wit my fiance a month ago. we been off and on durin the month up til now. Last week I told him i was completely done with him. We've known each other for 2 years (best friends) and we've been together for 7 months until the break up. I'm 20 yrs and so is he (he's also a marine). I been suffering from bpd (borderline personality disorder) and clinical major depression since 14. I tried tellin my ex bout my situation b4 we got 2getha so he cud understand wut I was goin thru. But becuz my intense irratibility and anger hurt him, he says he bcame depressed in the process. I felt guilty because I never meant to hurt him the way I did. But I honestly was mad at alot of decisions made and promises broken. He isnt ready for marriage becuz he said that I'm using the illnesses as an excuse 4 my behavior nd he basically abondoned me. I was willin 2 support him when he leaves 4 Iraq on 5-17-08 but he cant support me? He calls me @ 4 dis mornin sayin he cared-I'm confused but love himAlso I'm also seeking help right now for both issues and am on anti depressants. I truly love him and want things to work out. But he has to understand that he cant hold this ilness against me when he doesnt even do ANYTHING to try and help. He's going to be away for a year and more and right now i'm in school and working. I'm putting my life on hold for min because I want a future with him. He's my best friend before anything and it hurts that he doesnt think how I do. I wanna be there for him through everything cuz thats wut love is all about, taking a person for their flaws and all and support and help them when they're trying to make a difference in themselves. I never cheated, never lied, hell I was living in his PARENTS HOUSE and I guess he figured they could keep an eye on me when he's gone but I didnt care because truly LOVE him. I'd do anything for him. Then this morning he calls and he says that he still cares for me when b4 he said he didnt n e more. I'm movin on but wtf??To one of the answers below... u have no idea how much information i printed out and HIGHLIGHTED for him to look over and understand. I even asked him to go with me to one of my sessions to speak with a therapist but he refused to go with me. He basically said that I have to do this on my own. I plan on moving on with my life and the career I chose is Cosmetology because i want to direct hair and fashion shows ( i also do fashion design). I'm strong enough to go on by myself but I just dont want to end a relationship thats worth saving and worth working on.

[justme1435]

Nothing confusing about it. Being seperated he has relized just how important you are to him and how much he cares about you. People make this mistake all the time including myself. We never relize what we have until it is gone and is to late to get it back. Wish there was a way to open our eyes before we make mistakes that cost us the one's we love.for some relationship humor visit:http://www.shesrighthesright.com

[free_angel8816]

Count down the days before he leaves.

[dollyg9319]

see stop treating bad with him,he is the one who is supporting you.he can get gals better than u,but u wont get a guy like him everagain,so dont let him go,u are doin a mistake,do whatever it takes to make up this relationship

[katyr]

hey his going to b gone a year or more,so if u really love him like u say,why not take this time to pull ureself together,like u say u r doing,n,try to take one day at a time,write to him,n u no there r girls n iraq??so if he stays true to u,n not try to make excuses,then u two will make it,but i would go back top school,n try to find a carree,that will make u happy,n it will keep u bizzy,,good luck

[EricB5678]

Well you said that he can't hold this illness against you but does not do anything to help . . .what kind of person does not be upfront and honest about this BEFORE going into a relationship with someone. If you did not tell him before hand, bring him to the doctors and tell him how to support you, then how is he supposed to do it???? He may have just thought it was PMS, not BPD. Don't use this as a crutch as a reason why your relationship is falling apart. It either works, or it doesn't. Move on or try to make the relationship work, you are both too young to get married and neither one in a stable place in their lives.