Advise Please ...On my Marriage and Pregnancy.?

[crushedbutterfly22]

Okay lets start at the beginning, I got pregnant at 16, I had already graduated high school was in college on an early track to success. I dropped out of college, got married at 17 and had a baby boy 2 weeks later.
I thought everything would be ok. He got a good job, I was a stay at home mom. It was Wonderful. 2 years later we introduced our second son into the world which was planned & happily welcomed
About 8 weeks after my new son was born, I found some disturbing emails in my husbands folders on the pc,He cheated on me, WITH A MAN! He also had a lot of Adult friend finder accounts with emails to both sexes. I called the other MAN (whose # was in the emails), and he told me the whole story which was grusome and tmi in my opinion, but i asked for the explanation.
I loved my husband, I never cheated, I tried hard to be the best i could be. I was 19 years old, married 2 years, had 2 kids , just found out I was pregnant again after attempting to have sex not even finishing it.
Lost and confused. I out of anger and confusion and also strong health advisory from my doctor. had an abortion @ 6 weeks. I felt so bad, but with the post partum hemmorage I had with my baby, it left me very ill and weak, doctor said i should terminate, and with recent events in my marriage, i thought it was god ....shining light on a path.
My hubby pleaded to work it out, He said it was a 1 time thing, he said it was the worst experience of his life, he would never do it again. I have no evidence it ever has again.
I tried for almost 2 more years. Then 1 day I admitted defeat and left my husband, filed the divorce in the last year
I have lived in my own apartment, had my own job, been a single mother boys, I missed my Husband dearly, because he was my best friend.
My husband who I decided to try therapy with because we do have a family, and we do love each other, came over on his birthday Dec 30th, we hadn't been intimate in a long time, and we were that night !
I confess I was also seeing another man, and he and I had been intimate 3 days before that Dec 27th and the condom broke. I found out January 10th I was expecting....in the days leading from Dec 30th to Jan 10th , my husband and I began dating again, and said we were going to give it another try, with a year separation behind us. I never talked to that other guy again. Before I even found out I was pregnant , I had deleted his number.
I am scared out of my mind that I could be carrying another mans baby (my hubby knows I told him before I had even found out I was pregnant he is not happy of course.

my husband is white and the other man was black so it will be obvious to everyone (family and friends) what has happened when the baby is born and that scares me. I cant tell my family I am too ashamed, I cant tell my friends. Its not because I cant live with my choice, I am going to have to, but I just wanna be happy, and I feel like my husband even though he is not saying much now
he may resent me and the new baby when it is born and possibly not his

Plus we have 2 boys and I am scared of this being the girl we have always wanted and not even being "ours"

My hubby just left for Navy boot camp to give us a more stable life free of commisions and junk, and so we can both further our education , he knows that means a lot to me!

I am almost 13 weeks pregnant!

by the way I have health issues and i cannot take hormonal birth control, I can use condoms , and I did that! So dont lecture me on birth control and having sex, my kids are well taken care of, with love and affection , financially too, and those 2 sexual experiences were the only ones the WHOLE YEAR! and it was in the last week of the year

My doctor told me that i should have concieved between the 27th and the 30th GREAT HUH?

Of course I doubt his honesty in the sexuality business, but if i dont trust him sometime, when will I ?

WHAT WOULD U DO WITH YOUR MARRIAGE?
by the way ....I am 22 almost 23 now.

so this has taken place over the past 6 years til now.