What advice for saving my marriage?

[Charlie w]

My wife of 11 years is wanting out of our marriage. She is the love of my life and my soul mate (that is what I feel), and i desperately want to save my marriage. This started last year when I got involved in a chat room on my cell that led to some phone calls that I should not have made. Althought I did not do anything physically with anyone or myself, I know it devistated her. We sought counseling and were doing ok, but in Jan., after a string of bad things happening in her life (aunt died, dad very ill, mom treating her badly, her business doing bad, and her dad dying) she said she wanted out. In Feb. she told me she was seeing someone, although that is now over (she says). I have forgiven her completely and she says she has forgiven me, but she still wants out. She says I need to grow up and be more assertive. I am still seeing our counselor, but she is not. Can anyone give me some advice? i love her so much and I am desperate. Please help, esp. if you have a sim. situation. Thanks