Just wondering if someone could give me some in put on some poetry I am...

[MH09]

...writing for school.? The theme of the poem has to be about friendship...I don't want to explain the poem too much, but I'd like to see if it makes sense/sounds okay to anyone else...any imput would be great! and its not done yet.

Time chased us, those last few weeks.
We naively tried to beat her on the final bend
But she was faster than we had hoped.
Time told Summer to come to an end.

The cool breeze of August was an acute reminder
Of the piercing sadness that would come.
Time was the enemy, but we used her wisely
Praying my friend would never leave home.

The night before she left, we snuck outside.
Lying on the grass we stared at the sky,
A dark black hole where truth took cover.
Realizing, to ourselves, we had to lie.

So like children, we played pretend.
Believing that the morning would bring no ache
Imagining our lives as though we had power
And if for only a few hours we could not break.

[midnightchase68]

I like it and it makes sense to me. Waiting to see the rest of it, but I like what you have so far. Only thing I see is in the second stanza, you broke your rhyming scheme. Perhaps you meant to do so, but it probably should follow the same as all the rest. Perhaps you might want to work on that stanza just a bit.

[Crystal(Precognition)]

I like it, it makes sense to me...I think...
is it about two people who are really close spending their last moments together, and pretending that it will never end?
for some reason it makes me think of summer love. =)

[Canadian Bacon]

It's good enough for school.

If you want to me to critique as a poem rather than a school assignment, there's 2 main things. It reads as prose more than poetry, which isn't necessarily wrong. And it doesn't really have any rhythm. I see you have a rhyme scheme in place, but there's no syllable rhythm so the rhymes have no effect.

[cannon_primed]

i love it. this is the kind of poetry we need. note some simpleton crap that i see all the time. i like how u personify time. the rhythm is also good. good job.

[beaver]

yes, it makes sense, it is very good, i really like it, it is touching and beautiful

[cannon_primed]

i love it. this is the kind of poetry we need. note some simpleton crap that i see all the time. i like how u personify time. the rhythm is also good. good job.