How do you teach a child to remember?

[Sahara]

How do you teach kids to take responsibility for themselves and not rely on someone else to remember the key to get in the house? How do you get them to care?
Is it better to just let it be? Is it better to have a laissez-faire attitude (they'll learn on their own)?
under 10 and under 14. They had 2 keys. They have forgotten quite a few times. One leaves it at school and the other dropped it but didn't bother to retrieve it. They are both very lazy. (example: can you get me something to drink? answer: no, you can get yourself. response: Never mind then. )
I don't like the idea of cash rewards because these kids are money oriented already. That seems to be the only driving force. I don't think that's a good thing to continue?
I probably worry too much. I care about them but it's kind of hard when they don't seem to care themselves.
I love the necklace idea.
It's really the safety issue. They were locked out for 3 hours and it wasn't that cold. I guess we'll see in the future. I'm not their mom or dad. I'm a stepmom. I don't have my own kids.
My feeling is that the underlying issue is depression. They just don't seem that happy. They are not active at all. They hate their stepdad. Their mom is busy and doesn't seem to give them they seem to need. I feel for them. But they drive me crazy too but I do understand. I see what's going on. It makes me sad for them.
I'm going to suggest the keyless entry pad or to give us a key. It seems absurd. Surely, the 13 yo can keep the key in her pants' pocket. Of course her jeans are extremely tight. (no extra room at all) She's a string bean (for now).

[Jennyth]

say they get rewards if they remember the things, well if they're old enough they can get pocket money and if not, maybe candy or something. Make sure it's something they want. And keep your word when you say you're gonna get them something. or they might never trust you again

[lucylucy52]

maybe invest in some funky keyrings for them... ones that are large and colourful, making it more difficult to lose, or that can attach the key to the bag?

otherwise i'd stick to the laissez-faire attitude. if they get home and they are locked out, a good fifteen minutes or so wait in the cold won't do them any harm, but may reinforce the need for a key in their minds? good luck

[sofy8821]

Kids generally learn these things over time. If they are very young, say 5 or six, then they will generally find it more difficult to concentrate on "mature" concepts such as remembering to lock the front door and carrying a key. However, that is probably a generalisation as I know plenty of responsible kids who would have no trouble at all. It truly depends on the individual and you will know your kids best!

Children often act in the most responsible way when it appears to benefit them! For example, recycling every juice box they consume might not seem like it offers any reward to a young'in...compared with looking after a new pet in order for Mum to allow them to stay in the house! Try and make it into a bit of enjoyment for them; you could liken their responsible behaviour and the expectations for this to their favourite cartoon character? e.g. "Barney would always remember his front door key"

I don't think that a child is incapable of being responsible for their own actions. At school, from day 1, this is drummed into them with the allocation of tasks and jobs [e.g. watering plants as a classroom monitor]. I am a primary school teacher and every child in my class have their own jobs to do! Its lovely to see such behaviours echoed in the kids' home lives :]

You are still there as their parent; to remind them if they forget their key on a bad day, even if they make a habit of this. Some adults even behave in this way! In my opinion, the earlier the better for small allocations of duty and responsibility. Bombarding children with endless chores and duties doesn't interest me in the slightest ... but getting them to "care" about important features of their life [i.e. home safety, locking the front door, turning lights off etc] is really great to see :]

[Elyseholly]

remind them constantly. And have them put a key somewhere they will always have it on them, such as in their backpack, or on their bike, or in their lunch.

[DHC is Proud 2B Mommy]

Still having issues with these kids?? Their Dad has to get on their butts about taking responsibility for themselves. They don't listen to you, and without their father taking a stand in the way things are going, they won't change. You can't do it all by yourself.... But stay strong and firm with them... Hopefully they'll appreciate you someday.

As for the key, you could try humiliation... show up at their classroom with your hair in rollers wearing a bathrobe and give their key to them. When they get mad and yell after school about it, just tell them that EVERY time they forget their key... you will be sure to show up in their class to drop it off to them... betcha they won't forget it too many times...lol... Also, for every key they lose or leave behind at school or dropped on the street, THEY have to pay to have a new lock system put on the doors because you can't just have your house keys floating around because they don't want to bend over to pick it up. Make them both pay for new locks so that they stay on top of each other about losing the keys. Good Luck

[the16th]

Get the key and thread and make a key necklace and hang it around their necks.